Chit Chat: Failing To Meet Expectations

We have expectations for everyone but it is the expectations we have for ourselves that are the most important. Usually those expectations are very high. We typically expect much more of ourselves than we do from others. Up until I graduated from law school I always met those expectations and sometimes even exceeded them. However, for years now I have struggled.

I have expectations that I have built up centered on what kind of life I would live, what I would do, and my future goals. I have worked hard toward these goals for a very long time but despite the effort I have put forward I have been unable to accomplish most of my expectations. Where I stand today the reality of my life does not come near to meeting the plans I had for myself and the goals I had set.

I once read that disappointment is the difference between reality and expectations. I put a pressure on myself to perform and my expectations have led me to feeling like a failure. I set goals, I believed certain things would happen, I spent many years putting in the time and the work, I invested myself, and I did everything I thought I was supposed to. I have still fell short.

My failed expectations have lead to an immeasurable amount of time spent worrying, beating myself up, and unhappiness. I have reexamined my goals and where I thought I would be by now. If the things I had anticipated were unrealistic I could accept that and refocus my energy. Instead, I think that I have merely misstepped somewhere along the way and have been unable to find my way back on track.

Until I can get back on the right path I am trying to accept that life has thrown me a curve ball and that I need to use this as a learning experience to better myself and to hopefully realize what achievements would really bring me happiness. Seeing this as the end of the world is wrong. Mistakes and failure happen. It is part of being human. Right now my focus needs to be on bouncy. I am not sure how that will happen yet but giving up cannot be an option.

How do you deal will failing to meet goals or expectations you have set for yourself?

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